asphinctersezwhut?

I have awesome friends. When they heard I hadn't ever seen the movie "Wayne's World" they put together dinner and a special screening, just for me! Of course I didn't hear about till 2 days before, heh heh, glad I made it. So here's my review.

Wayne's World is one of a long list of movies created from Saturday Night Live sketches. Wayne (Mike Meyers) and Garth (Dana Carvey) are two friends who host a public access show out of Wayne's parent's basement (...excellent!). A scheming television producer buys the show for network television, and hilarity, parties, rock 'n roll, babes, heartbreak, and three different endings ensue. Pretty typical and formulaic, a fact that the director is fully aware of and mocks continually throughout the film.

Much like my mock review.

Ok, I'm tired of writing like that now. [reverts to normal] I'd give it a solid B. It's not Oscar material; it's SNL, what do you expect?! But it stayed true to the original flavor of the sketches, and I think they're funny, so there. Lots of jokes now make way more sense, and I can cross out another entry on the "List of Movies I Never Saw Cuz My Parents Wouldn't Let Me." (love you, mom and dad...)

Highlights:

• Alice Cooper's history lesson about Milwaukee, gotta love that guy.
• "If she was the President, she'd be Babe-raham Lincoln."
• Nice cameo by Chris Farley, it's waaaayyy too bad he died.
• "I mean, Led Zeppelin didn't write tunes that every one liked. They left that to the Bee Gees."
• The Mirth-mobile
• "It's like people only do things because they get paid, and that's just really sad."
• Bohemian Rhapsodie headbanging
• "I once thought I had mono for an entire year, it turned out I was just really bored."
• Robert Patrick, gotta love that guy too.

So there ya go. Standard movie fare that everyone my age should have seen by now and probly should catch up on if you haven't. I can't say your life will be better for it, but it'll be a little less boring for two hours.

If yer life is boring, that is.

Not to insinuate it is...

Hoo boy.

Requiem Pisiculus Obesum

It is my sad duty to pass along the information that sometime during the night of March 22-23, 2006, Molly the Balloon Molly passed away. A hybrid of the Poecilia latipinna species, she was well known for her innate curiosity and hearty appetite.

Molly joined The Fishtank in November 2004, as one of four balloon mollies. She was the youngest and smallest of the group, and unique in her salt-and-pepper coloring; characteristics for which the others constantly harassed and abused her. The other females were domineering, and Bubba the male tried to force his affections on her continually. She was often chased away from the dinner table, and left only scraps to clean up afterwards. The harsh conditions frequently left her ill. But her hard life made her tough and resilient, and Molly outlived not only her wicked step-sisters but her abusive boyfriend as well.

After the passing of the other mollies, Molly quickly grew healthy and began to enjoy her life of freedom from oppression. She loved to play with the other fish in the Tank, and filled a big sister role for many of the smaller tetras. She was neat and fastidious, quickly cleaning up any consumables left laying around the Tank. Indeed, she would eat anything she could fit in her mouth, and quite a bit that wouldn't. Molly was very affectionate and friendly, and was well known for following her owner around the room from the front of the Tank. They were very close, and her sudden and unexpected passing has left the family shocked and saddened.

Molly is survived by The Band of Five, The Clean-up Crew, and a bunch of little snails. Donations in her memory can be sent to CLiFF, the Center for Little Fat Fish.

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

The lights of the city play
Across the surface of the water.
As the big light sets,
The little ones vie for a place of their own,
Their own moment of importance.
Each has a purpose,
Each has a story to tell
Of the things it saw today.

I too am a light, looking to be
Seen among a billion others.
I search for a place of my own,
My moment of importance.
I want a purpose,
I want a story to tell,
But I fear I got lost amid the sudden blaze of the city.

A Slip of the Tongue

The classic first post. Do I introduce myself? Do I fill in the whole backstory as to why I'm doing this and why you should care, though I know you won't? Do I just ignore it altogether and get on with the ramblings?

Maybe all of the above, maybe none of it. I could say "Hi, my name is Billy Bob, and I have important things to say", but it'd be mostly untrue. Some things that are true are that I like Darjeeling tea and poking things that live in tide pools. And if you want an opinion, here's one - James Christensen is by far one of the better living artists, and when he dies, he'll be one of the better dead ones too.

That's all you get right now though. There will more, I promise. And it'll be infinetly more interesting than this crap.

But for now, accipio universum - Welcome to my world.